Writer. Fighter. Lover. Dreamer. The doctor's say she's generally functional.

Monday, April 20, 2009

Day 5 - Saigon

Went to church today - it was really very special.

There was a priest from the village I went to, visiting. I was so excited. Told him I was there yesterday, and everyone burst out laughing. Seems I've really travelled to the end of the road! Even the local haven't been there. And people from there don't believe I went. Thank god for cameras.

After church, my wallet got stolen. And I know exactly who took it! This woman I bought a drink from.Found an ATM and took my cash out to get back to the hostel - Thank god for MasterCard! It was like an ad, a weary traveller, out of cash, finds a MasterCard machine and has a cool bottle of water before heading back home. Now I've learnt. I'm glad it wasn't more - about $50 USD.

The homily at church was meaningful beyond words.

Since it was about doubting Thomas, the priest brought up the quote from René Descartes, who said, I think therefore, I am. And he said there's another translation which reads, I doubt, therefore I am.

Which means, he doubted everything. His mind, body, soul, friends, family, existence. And he came to think, the only thing he doesn't doubt is his doubt. And therefore, he was. It was just the thing I needed to hear - such profound words! And in the reading it said that, "This is love for God: to obey his commands. And his commands are not burdensome, for everyone born of God overcomes the world. This is the victory that has overcome the world, even our faith."

So there's this hand-in-hand partnership between doubt and faith! And I'm reminded of a Thoreau quote which I put on my blog. "I know this well, that if one thousand men, if one hundred, if ten men who I could name - if ten honest men - ay, if ONE honest man in this state of Massachusetts, ceasing to hold slaves, were actually to withdraw from this corporation and be locked up in jail therefor, it would be the abolition of slavery in America. For it matters not how small the beginning might seem."

How much I learn from these words - and to know that Jesus' words and the discples words and my literary heroes have the same concept. He also said that we journey to find truth. And we hurt, and experience pain, and that is to heal the wounds we already have.

Didn't expect my journey to be religious, but now I see - whether it's Jesus or Thoreau or Orwell or Tolstoy, I journey to find truth.


  1. know that as you seek the truth, Truth himself is desperately seeking you! when you two do meet, that would be a moment of grace for you... ;-)

    seriously! :-)

  2. Hey girlie,, last verse of 2nd reading says,'The Spirit is the one that testifies, and the Spirit is truth!' Hmmmm.....What was it you are searching for again???

  3. Fr Al - I do hope to find truth - and it is the journey, not the destination, that I now hope to experience - right?

    Mama - I'm searching for truth. I'm searching for soul. I'm searching for love. I'm searching. =)